Shaq Will Not Go Gently Into the Off-Season

While the other "Superman" leads the Magic to the Finals, a fading Shaq is doing his best to distract you

By JANIE CAMPBELL
Updated 12:42 PM EDT, Wed, Jun 3, 2009

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A few things have become clear in the NBA post-season: Dwight Howard is a beast.  LeBron needs a better supporting cast. Stan Van Gundy could use a cough drop. 

And Shaquille O'Neal WILL NOT BE IGNORED, AMERICA.

What is wrong with him? The big guy's arguably the greatest center the NBA's ever seen, and his boisterous, child-like personality makes him one of the most beloved. Shoot, the entire universe knows him by just four letters. 

But as age is naturally forcing him to cede the stage to younger, up-and-coming big men, we're seeing a jealous, petty, annoying Shaq. And he's demanding your attention -- again, like a child.

"Dwight Howard? Who's that? I don't know that name," Shaq recently told Sports Illustrated about the well-respected "impostor" that fans have awarded Shaq's old nickname, "Superman." The world wishes to anoint Howard Shaq's successor, and with good reason -- like the shot-clock breaking dunk in Game 1 against Cleveland.

Envious much? Back in January, Shaq had already stated his opinion: "I was the type of player that they had to have secret meetings and change the rules and do all that. Probably never be another me. He's a good player, but everything he's done, I've invented. So I'm not impressed." 

That's funny, because Howard's the one who destroyed Cleveland and seduced America while Shaq watched from the sidelines -- in Orlando, where fans still haven't forgiven him for the way he ended things between them. Shaq's courtside appearance was a brazen one, and downright insensitive after telling the media that Stan Van Gundy was a "master of panic" and everyone hates him. But more importantly to Shaq: his Game 4 attendence was headline-making and camera-stealing.

It worked, too. Everyone is talking about Shaq again! Oops. Back to Dwight How...Hey, there Shaq is again, posting Britney Spearsian photos of his head half-shaved and wearing a wig.

See?  The minute focus shifts, there's Shaq to remind everyone he exists, how great he is, and how inferior others are -- especially the just-as-likable guy who's resurrecting the franchise Shaq left for dead. It's a shame, too. The basketball-watching public certainly knows Shaq's place in history can't be taken, so why doesn't he relax, remember it himself, and graciously let someone else be talented? 

Like a real big man.

First Published: Jun 2, 2009 4:54 PM EDT on NBC Miami

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