In Hot Water: Baldwin's Trump Takes Jabs at Manafort, Weinstein in 'SNL' Cold Open - NBC Connecticut

In Hot Water: Baldwin's Trump Takes Jabs at Manafort, Weinstein in 'SNL' Cold Open

"We're gonna wait a few weeks and dress you like a turkey, and then we'll pardon you"

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    NEWSLETTERS

    Days after the first Russia probe indictments, "Saturday Night Live" continued to show the Trump administration in hot water—this week's the cold open ended with President Donald Trump and his team in the shower.  

    Alec Baldwin's Trump secretly visited a former adviser who has been indicted in the Russia probe, offering little advice, but: "Hang in there, Paul."

    After complimenting former campaign chairman Paul Manafort, played by Alex Moffat, on his expensive suit and oriental rugs (a reference to the items purchased by the real Manafort with laundered money), Trump expressed concern. 

    "You're screwed. You're so, so screwed," he said.

    The real Manafort was indicted on 12 charges Monday as part of the special counsel's probe into Russian ties to Trump's presidential campaign.

    As Trump met with Manafort, Air Force One flew from Hawaii to Asia, mirroring the trip that the real President Trump is currently on. Baldwin's Trump fooled the world into thinking he's traveling. First lady Melania, played by Cecily Strong, sat next to a doll version of the president, and "for the first time in 10 years" it was quiet enough for her to talk. 

    "Who knew that just by keeping your mouth shut you could seem so presidential," Melania said to the doll.

    Meanwhile, Baldwin's Trump and Moffat's Manafort got in the shower to talk privately, after the president checked him for a wire. As they spoke, Vice President Mike Pence, played by Beck Bennett, and Attorney General Jeff Sessions, played by Kate McKinnon, joined them.

    While they were unable to pardon Manafort in the shower, they had a backup plan: "We're gonna wait a few weeks and dress you like a turkey, and then we'll pardon you."

    And Baldwin's Trump couldn't resist weighing in on the recent Hollywood sexual assault scandals.  

    "What an idiot that Harvey Weinstein is. He could've gotten away with all of it, if only he had gotten himself elected president," he said.

    The real Donald Trump has been accused of sexual assault by a number of women.

    "Weekend Update" also opened with indictment news, Colin Jost calling it part of a "Robert Mueller surprise party" for the one-year anniversary of Trump winning the election. 

    "I don't know what [Manafort] is guilty of, but it's definitely not nothing," Jost said. "No one has three passports, a burner phone and good intentions, except maybe Santa Claus."

    Michael Che recapped Trump's tweets on the probe, saying he's "tired of watching the president of the United States have an emotional breakdown on social media like he's Tyrese."

    "Indictments are important and you work for us," Che said, speaking to Trump. "So go put on your baggy suit, fold your hair nice and answer all of our questions face-to-face like the public servant that you are."

    Jost also touched on Trump's call to end a visa program after one of its recipients carried out a terror attack in New York City on Halloween.

    "Obviously this attack was awful, but I'm not sure we should get rid of an entire immigration program based on the actions of one deranged individual," he said. "I mean, we don't look at Trump and say, 'We should get rid of all presidents.'"

    Host Larry David revived his Sen. Bernie Sanders impression for a  celebrity edition of "The Price Is Right."

    "We're gonna win this thing the Bernie way, which means if I lose, I'll bring everyone else down with me," David's Sanders said.

    After being asked to offer a best guess on the price of a washing machine, he decided to point out the "real problem."

    "The real problem in this country is American consumerism," he said. "Who needs a washer? When I need to wash the one suit I own, I just wait until it rains, I stand outside for 15 minutes and then I jog behind a bus until the exhaust dries me off."

    White House press secretary Sarah Huckabee Sanders, played by Aidy Brayant, took questions from reporters, but as they got more difficult—on indictments, chief of staff John Kelly's remarks on the Civil War—her daydreaming got more vivid.

    In her mind, she was Demi Lovato singing her pop hit "Confident," which seems to give her a boost to answer questions. 

     


    In Larry David's opening monologue, he did not shy away from Hollywood's biggest controversy.

    "You know, a lot of sexual harassment stuff in the news of late," he said. "And I couldn’t help but notice a very disturbing pattern emerging, which is that many of the predators—not all, but many of them—are Jews."

    To that, David said, "Oy vey izmir," which means "Woe is me."

    "I want 'Einstein discovers the theory of relativity,' 'Salk cures Polio,'" David said, talking about headlines he would prefer Jews to have. "What I don’t want: 'Weinstein took it out.'"

    The "Curb Your Enthusiasm" star said he strives to be a "good Jewish representative."

    Musical guest Miley Cyrus performed two songs, "Bad Mood" and "I Would Die for You."